This morning is when I cleaned the bathroom. Here is a paradox… Cleaning the bathroom is gross, so I don’t do it very often. But, if I did it more frequently, it wouldn’t be so gross. SOLUTION: Purchase a disposable bathroom.
I went to Master Wong’s Foot Clinic in San Gabriel, CA today. It seemed to be Master Wong’s daughter who massaged me. She felt like the gracefully aging daughter of a regal Chinese master. Then she answered her cell phone and carried on a conversation while rubbing my neck. Master Wong would not stand for this. (He would probably do something very honorable, like burn incense in a stone hut, as a show of disapproval. That’s what masters do.)
I watched The Bourne Identity. Now all I want to do is stab bad people with a pen and have a laser implanted in my hip.
Taco Bell sold me a crunchy (formerly called “hard shell”) taco today. At first, I was worried when some of the grated cheese spilled off the taco and onto my passenger seat. I thought something like, “Oh no! Food got on my passenger seat!” Then I remembered fast food cheese isn’t food. (UPDATE: I put the cheese in my gas tank. So far so good.)